A few months ago, I posted 7 SEO idiots and subsequently received myriad ideas for other SEO idiots. Below you’ll find 12 more SEO idiots with dialogue and oatmeal-like depictions. Thank you to everyone who submitted ideas. For those ideas I’ve used, I’ve given the comment author a link.
Poor Link Requester
Three years ago, I remember hearing that 3-way link exchanges would be the new wave of linkbuilding. Unfortunately, those who still request these types of link exchanges are behind the curve. Many SEO idiots who request these link exchanges, ask for a link from your main homepage and only offer you a pathetic link on their affiliate site’s links page.
Submitted by Jim Rudnick
1997 SEO
These SEOs had their glory days in the late 90s. They were able to game even the best of search engines. However, getting SEO results in the late 90s has no bearing on the ability to achieve rankings today. Many of these SEOs focus on meta keywords and keyword stuffing. Stay away from these old-timers.
Submitted by Jill Kocher
Blackhatter Who Continuously Raises SE Flags
I’m not out to bash any particular SEO company here, especially in lieu of recent events. But, let’s be honest, blackhat or greyhat practices don’t just hurt the reputation of the offending SEO company–poor practices also hurt the entire SEO industry.
Submitted by Gary Young
Garage SEO with a Confidential Client List
If no client list exists, that can only mean 1 of 2 things. Either he/she signed a confidentiality agreement with his/her clients or he/she doesn’t have any clients worth mentioning. I’m going to guess it’s the latter. Lack of a company website should be a good red flag that the individual has no idea what he/she is doing.
Submitted by Eric Miltsch
The “I won’t come to your office for less than $5000″ SEO
Evidently, there are some pompous individuals in the industry. More power to them. Even if an SEO can provide incredible results and charge high prices, that doesn’t give him permission to treat others with a “holier than thou” attitude.
Submitted by Warner Carter
Backlink Buyer
Much like the Blackhatter above, the Backlink Buyer makes a living from buying and selling links. While this SEO may be good at staying ahead of Google’s spam net, his tactics will eventually be discovered.
Submitted by Bill Bolmeier
Future SEO
These SEOs are thinkers but never doers. They’ll talk your ear off about new, innovative techniques and how they could pull off the “perfect” campaign. But when it comes to actually doing the work, they never perform.
Submitted by Jonas
Web Designer SEO
These yahoos are similar to the Conversion Expert who thinks that conversion optimization will somehow result in higher rankings. Admittedly, I used to be one of these SEOs. If someone is making design recommendations to improve SEO, this person is probably a web developer who has merely dabbled in SEO.
Submitted by NatC
Moon on a Stick SEO
These SEOs are great. They can make huge ranking promises with unbelievable guarantees or warranties. However, their contracts’ fine print usually mentions that they’ll only get rankings for long-tail or obscure keyphrases.
Submitted by theWebalyst
Off Page Only SEO
Contrasting the Sparkling, White Hat SEO, this SEO prefers to do off-page SEO only. In fact, this SEO probably has no clue how to perform on-page optimization. Good luck trying to get him to do keyword research and on-page SEO.
Submitted by Afzal Khan
Packaging SEO
Because SEO is one of those things that can be compartmentalized into specific packages (NOT), this SEO has taken the packaging syndrome to a whole new level. He makes it easy on you by allowing you to choose from an internet marketing menu of sorts. Don’t get me wrong, many SEO ‘tasks’ can be packaged, but SEO as a whole, is too complex and constantly changing to be easily segmented into basic packages.
Submitted by Daniel Dessinger
PPC Guy
The PPC Guy SEO has never learned what the word, “organic,” means. Hey, PPC is basically the same as SEO, right? At least that what he thinks. He believes his expert PPC skills fully qualify him as an SEO expert as well.
Submitted by Rasmus Himmelstrup
Excite and Infoseek? LOL – Thats funny
This is great! Many applications visible in real-time. What do you do when your SEO falls under more than one of these categories?
@David…
I am rightfully happy to be included in this list…
and as yet there is NO “viagra-for-kitties.com”…but someone will buy it for sure after reading this great post, eh!
Jim
Hey David,
I liked your creativity of converting those ideas into this great post…Thanks for your love & mention’s
Now we have (7+12=19) more SEO Idiots and hopefully this list will keep growing, there’s so many SEO Jerk still waiting to get their name is this list…lol!!!
Keep up the good work:-)
Thanks for the credit and letting me know. Its both a funny and useful post – quite a rarity!
Mark (in London)
P.S. Typo in moon on a stick (ever -> never!)
David,
Your 1st post was awesome & this is simply great how you incorporated our comments into the post. Very nicely done as usual.
Thx!
Okay. Okay. You make some great points here. We’ve all seen these things running around the industry…
But you DON’T really make a case at all for what GOOD SEO really is? After all, it is easy to throw stones. What about defining the GOOD? I’d very much like to see that next…
Cheers! Good post!
Very True, Adam. We need to see what a good SEO looks like. I might put that on my list of future blog posts.
What? A “future blogger”?
@Afzal Nice to meet you here buddy!
You can see me in the next few ones.
@David Talk to me.
This list includes everyone I know in the SEO industry and I think Im a bit of all of them… cept the one with the beard. I had a beard once but didnt like it. ;P
this is easily one of my favorite posts from seo.com.
I can definitely say I have personally had experience with all of these types of “seo’s”
I got a good laugh from several of them.
David hit the Nail on the head with this one! There are so many self proclaimed SEO GODS out there that they are give the rest of us a BAD name. Stop it.
Pretty funny… I was actually attending a so called search seminar today, where the speaker mentioned the importance of social influence. When asked he did however point out that linkbuilding was more important
Oh phooey. Another list I wasn’t included in.
What’s a guy got to do to earn some serious disrespect?
.. someone please point me to the first 9. =)
What a funny and sadly true list! One of the things that really make me laugh in Denmark: We have self proclaimed SEO experts claiming to have 12 years of experience with SEO – but they are between 22 and 24 years old. Come on guys!
Self proclaimed are always dangerous whether an SEO, a musician or wanna be…..well it’s not the case only in Denmark in every other part of the world SEO industry is victim of self proclaimed highly experienced SEO guys ( Oops did I told u d truth:-)….. Such folks knows the SEO even before world wide web came into existence!
Prolific article.
@David You should have slid in a few SEO names in the article and that would have caught more attention
Would you take that risk?
I feel much better about the SEOs I associate with. None of them can be listed in SEO idiots. BTW I’m guessing you’re not an SEO if you’re an idiot. (heh heh)
Hilarious because it is true!
I find it alarming to see such a post on the internet from an Industry professional. Not once do you see the traits of a “white hat” SEO professional, which shows your immaturity. You should start showing some respect to industry leaders, without your company kid you’d have absolutely nothing to write about. Your comments are 100% unprofessional and uncalled for. wow I had 100% respect for you guys until this post was exposed! Todd Herman.
@Todd – Can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic with your reply or if you just happen to take yourself too seriously; if so, lighten up & smile. It’s just a joke.
Hopefully I’m wrong & missing the inside joke with your comment.
Interesting to see your list. But I have one question: what is NOT on your list?
LOVE IT! Great article that I just sent along to my team. My fav part:
Moon on a Stick SEO
I could get you ranked on fuzzy purple widgets, but what will that really do to your bottom line?
Brilliant.
Keli
Damm.. I resemble a few of those categories.
I am definitely a 1997 SEO. I have the beard but I’m not bald.
I was building cloaked pages for 12 different search engines AND CHARGING BY INDEXED POSITION.
I brought one site from $400 a month in used CD sales to over $1000 a day using cloaking and a streamlined ordering process.
This was before it was considered black hat so I miss the black hat category.
I am definitely a Web Designer SEO.
I firmly believe that the position of the page elements in the code and visually, affects results.
It doesn’t have to be pretty. In fact “pretty” often detracts from top indexing.
I am also Moon on a Stick.
Heck.. I have been practicing SEO for well over a decade.
If i could not master my trade in that length of time I would not offer it.
Over 85% of a clients keyword phrases end up on page 1 of Google results.
This runs from the short to the long-tail and in-between.
I produce the top results for which I am hired.
Packaging SEO.
As I do not believe that links = top SERPS, I don’t offer them.
best,
Reg
nbs-seo.com
Nice post.
I had a nice laugh.
lol lol lol
not sure which category i fit into. probably depends on which day it is and which client i am working for.
Hi M8,
Thanks for using my suggestion and thanks for credit..awesome.
/Jonas
Haha, Web Designer SEO is my favourit. One proposal: Wolfram Alpha SEO. Thanks for this great article, David.
Great Post
Web Designer SEO’s are the bain of my life.
Really enjoyed this blog post. Concise way of communicating a lot of info that could have been a really boring blog post if it was just text and no Oatmeal
I believe we all are a bit of most of them, only the extreme are bad
LOL This was an AMAZING post! The biggest lesson I have learned after being in the SEO industry for quiet some time now is the fact that there IS no real “SEO expert” out there. You can find individuals and companies who may have tons of experience and know how to handle certain situations – however with the changing nature of the internet and search engines themselves, the expertise deteriorates and can only be sustained with research. A review of the various internet marketing and SEO services that you should incorporate are briefed here and can be read through: http://www.9thsphere.com/services_marketing.html (reputation management is something many companies overlook). Of course one must not just be bogged down by “SEO” only and should leverage all other aspects of internet marketing as well.
I just hate how companies that have been working for so many years now, can still come up and promote their services as a “GUARANTEED” rankings. How on earth can you guarantee rankings when the place where you want your clients to get ranked doesn’t even BELONG to you! Google can screw you up ANY DAY at ANY TIME! LOL @ Viagara-for-kitties
I love the ‘Packaging SEO’ (not)
but seriously, how would you best price your work or intended work?
We know that time = money and the more time an SEO have to work on a site the better the results can be… how then do you approach a new client?
Your input here is much appreciated,
Having specific packages is not necessarily a bad thing. However, when the package includes ambiguous services like “1000 directory links,” then it becomes more of a scam. Packages force companies and clients to focus on what’s included in the package rather than what they really want: higher rankings.
If you can figure out a way to create packages that truly provide results for clients, then, by all means, go for it!
Rand Fishkin, of SEOMoz.org, sheds some light on SEO pricing: http://www.seomoz.org/blog/seo-pricing-costs-what-should-you-charge-how-much-should-you-pay
“Having specific packages is not necessarily a bad thing.”
I agree! If you have packaged based around actual services I think it’s perfectly acceptable and also easier to pitch to clients. For instance, you could have a package with just basic on-page SEO and another more advanced package that has both on-page and off-page SEO. Or one package could include writing for and managing the client’s blog, whereas a smaller plan would leave that task up to the client.
I also think it works well to have blended service packages- one package is just SEO, one package is SEO and PPC, and one package is SEO and PPC and shopping feeds. Since these things all work together anyways, why not create “packages” to encourage clients to have a well rounded marketing approach?
Ah thanks David,
I one read that article by Rand and thought it was brilliant!
As for more experience with clients, they love buying packaged ‘deals’ but I hear exactly what you’re saying. Value should be added that really increases rank >> traffic and ROI.
Appreciate your time,
The #13 on this list could be “I am going to sell you X and throw in a website and SEO for a nominal fee.”
X being a premium listing on a directory such as Yellow Pages or Thomasnet.
We have all seen countless websites that are “designed” and “optimized” by these two companies and their efforts are shameful and actually hurt the reputations of true SEO and Web Design Companies.
Excite and Infoseek – new for me.
But nice. You have listed all the ways that people mail to guarantee you the best SEO of ur website
I too have got some similar mails
ATUL
Useful… Website owners can now easily identify self proclaiming SEO experts
David that was a great read with my coffee and an excellent way to start the day. A good SEO joke is good for the marketer’s soul!
I’d add the “conspiracy theory” SEO who are they SEOs that undercut the strategy of others (no matter how good) in order to make a sale. They usually send a generic email with a claim that “we’ve noticed your SEO didn’t submit you to this (insert low-quality) directory…”, which usually leads the current SEOs client questioning their strategy – even if it’s top-notch!?!
I get trying to steal clients and make sales. I understand that SEOs eat their young and are always trying to poke holes in the SEO strategies of others, but jeez…
lol, seems incredible but it’s true!
Is $600 a month a high SEO budget for a Realtor web page? I contacted this site and a diffrent SEO company contacted me. I set up an account with BoostAbility and have started with them. I am know just going back and checking up on the intial process of finding an SEO company and trying to determin if I choose a good company? Any feedback would be appreciated.
I believe Web Designer Guy is kind of right. Cleaning up code can improve your site loading time and site loading is a Google ranking factor.
This is so true many so called SEO experts (who just about know how to use a computer) fall into one of these categories. Brilliant post and funny
excellently written and cleverly presented article. It is indeed a joy to read such stuff as it gives information as well as fun. Thanks for sharing.
Lol, I still get some contrived spam emails asking us if we want “1997″ type SEO. The best part is we are an SEO company ourselves so I always love getting those emails.
There is nothing wrong with not being a mass production factory building SEO friendly websites for $500 a pop. $5000 is not high if the company is actually a reputable company that has delivered for its clients. Also if the company is highly-consultative it is not unusual to have a higher price that other companies. When the ship goes down, they really will do all they can to service your website and lead you in the right direction.
Todd needs to relax.
..
I am with Jim… If you have not been most of these characters you have not done real SEO. Everybody that grew up in lockstep with the industry has been in most of these categories.
Melissa,
How long, how many hours does it take you to build an ecommerce site with a SEO friendly layout, all the necessary backend to handle product pricing (tax shipping) and display, customer – product – banner – affiliate – & article management?
Would you believe just over 5 hours?
And not in a mass production environment.. This is done in a one on one environment.
best,
Reg
nbs-seo.com
Nice title and pic representation.. :p
Thanks David – I HOPE that every SEO expert that will read this post, will relate with some of the characters, at least one of them.
If someone will say that they can’t relate to any of them, even just a bit- they are lying!
( I found myself twice, in some little way ) Guess which one
By the way – exellent images! Thanks for great post
David Man Kudos to you.
So amazing presentation, i was laughing when i was going through this post. Unfortunately very true story. There are very few true professional companies or individual there who really value there words. But really a great post i ever come across with so much good presentation. Thanks again.
San
A winning combination of humor and analysis of service providers of SEO!
OMG! This is the best ever written guide about hiring a SEO.
I know many of this profiles XD
Great article…I’m in search for a strong SEO provider, and it’s turning out to be quite the challenge. It’s turned into a 2nd job. Thanks for info.
There’s also something to be said for having no “proof”. Do they have any personal sites that they do SEO for? What about the SEO company’s rankings? If the answer to these questions is “no”, you may want to ask why.
Excellent! I’ve shared this with a few friends and thought the images were hilarious!
@Andrew Johnson, I agree with you, but having worked for a large UK SEO / Web design company (ahem, ‘factory’) which has some very enviable and impressive listings in Google.co.uk, and knowing that they are:
a) Very good at looking after their own backyard
but that,
b) They practice a ‘one size fits all’ approach to SEO,
c) They let their sales team choose keywords,
d) They have a ‘link network’ of all their clients…
So, although on the surface, they know SEO, and it works (until Google detects their ‘link network’) the argument that if ‘they can do it for themselves, then they can do it for their clients’ is true in THEORY, and it’s a sound theory (and a great sales tactic, one should add)it doesn’t necessarily ring true. The company I worked for can do it for themselves, but for the majority of their clients they miss the point at the initial stages, by letting inexperienced and inaccurate salespeople choose the keywords based on ‘fuzzy logic’. The internal SEO is carried out, exceptionally well, by the web designers, so all their ‘SEO Consultants’ actually do is build links using their network of clients…
So now, whilst I may not have page 1 listings for my company’s website (yet!), I do very well for my clients. I spend time choosing converting keywords. I do not have a link network (which I missed in the first few weeks of not having, because it’s p!$$ easy to get a page 1 listing with a huge network of over 3000 clients and growing to use for linking…) I actually spend more time guest blogging than anything else these days. My clients have good listings, and receive traffic directly from the links I build. As far as I’m concerned, when I worked for my previous employer who still has great listings for some very enviable and impressive keywords I wasn’t really practicing SEO.
I guess all I’m saying is, yes the SEO company should have good listings, but it’s better to find out if their clients make more money after employing their services. That’s the nub of the matter.
I have to agree with Amelia on this one – the quality of some of the large SEO co's is terrible. I recently outsourced some work to a company that will also remain unnamed. A couple of weeks later the site went from having around 30 pages on page one of the G SERPs to all pages sitting on page 5. The clown, sorry, 'SEO expert' spend about an hour trying to convince me that this wasn't a penalty as, "none of their other customers had experienced this issue". That said, the 'expert' wouldn't give me the URLs because of client confidentiality.
@ David Scoville – (I know this tip came from Eric Miltsch, but…) what's wrong with not having a portfolio? Doesn't everyone have to start somewhere? Can you honestly say that the interns SEO companies emply get paid nothing for 6 months – one year (or until they prove themselves)? Your comment is similar to one made by a very large, very well known SEO company that said, [sic] "Don't trust one man band SEO's, only trust large companies" – look where that got one of the sites I manage!. If the comment is a generalisation then you couldn't be any wider of the mark. We all need to start somewhere even if it is only on a trial basis. If, instead, you're talking about high value, competitive niches then I do agree with you (somewhat).
Ref: Packaging SEO by @Daniel Dessinger
We provide SEO services also in packages using the same terms you mentioned here!! I almost agree with your argument but would like to point some other sides of the issue: SEO services can’t be standardised ever and submitting to 100 SE, 200 directories, 300 articles etc. are totally crap and personally I think its an SEO scam. So, what we offer in our SEO packages? well, we define the extent of work in different level. For example, in expensive packages, we offer to write and promote client’s blogs, maintain social media accounts etc. while we do not offer such service in the cheaper one.
Now question may arise how we rank them if we work on contract basis rather than necessary basis?!! Well, we are always transparent with our clients and we spend significant amount of time educating our client’s on SEO. We speak with them in the first place about their need, expectations, possible outcomes etc. And a business secret, “sometimes we go extra mileage for clients SEO work; after all end of the month they will evaluate our work by comparing the improved sales, traffic and ranking, right?”
Yep, what you are wondering is the same question I’m asked by my search team: “If we work the extra things, why the heck we didn’t sell them the appropriate package?” The answer is obvious and it also answers the question of the need for SEO service as package! Client’s like to pick one while buying like they always do at shopping mall! They see, touch, read and pick one. We want to give such customer segment a choice! Besides, who sales directly to SMB owners, sometimes they look for the cheaper options. We try to keep them onshore.
I agree with you that there are a lot of fary tales about seo and just like in the ‘real’ world, you’ve got to work hard to improve your search engine rankings.
Regards,
Roy Olders
So what should a SEO guy do to earn his living? I am talking about normal guys who don’t have the god gifted luck of getting hired by Google, IBM, Dell, Lexmark etc etc just after they complete graduation.
Made me laugh as much as the other one.
I think you can package the service if you are taking a balanced approach between the service offered and the results returned. One company I worked for had packages based around the number of keywords tracked and ranked. They offered a guarantee of 30% of those keywords on page one within three months, it can be done if keyword selection is done right. We would pick off 30% that were obtainable in that time but did deliver some traffic while the other keywords were longer term targets.
Where I’m working now I’m helping these guys set up from scratch and while we will be doing the set packages, its more campaign based with sets of related keywords although ideally we would rather custom quote clients based on their goals, state of their site etc, etc…
Packaging SEO is really funny thing for making someone fool.
This is really very worthwhile, thanks for writing it. Remember to also visit our website. We are a business that provides Search engine optimization services, Web Site Design, Custom Software package Development and IT solutions in Philadelphia.
Oh my. XD I read through all your ‘SEO idiots’ posts, and I can only agree with you. What these people forget is that there is no winning side of the game; everything counts, and definitely, the truth is in the middle, as they say. I see SEO more like a big collection of smart, honest (enough!) moves and A LOT of creativity. ^^
~ Luana S.
wow….what a nice article….there are so many pro bloggers and SEO experts who are helping all new bloggers LIKE ME.this type of articles somewhere help us a lot to grow.
thanx a lot for sharing your views…:-)
[How to] Add Google +1 Button to your website – blog [Ready] (Google Webmaster Central)
I hope it’s not too late to add on as I’ve got another suggestion for “experts” to avoid. I recently had the displeasure of dealing second-hand with a firm that gave a client a lengthy “report” on his website SEO that was obviously created by a program (even though they said they went through the site manually.)
I should say a faulty program. It reported that the site didn’t have a relevant 404 page, which it did; didn’t have any sitemaps, which it did, both xml and for visitors. It also claimed that none of the images had alt tags…which they did. These were among the most egregious errors, but there were a lot more. In fact, about 75% of the report was incorrect, thus, total garbage.
I guess the best name for this type of SEO idiot is: The “Yeah, I examined your site thoroughly for holes…using some crappy software” SEO guy.
I am still researching the aspect of diectories and started one up to see for myself how it works out. who knows!
I reread this and still laugh!
Wow, Love that pictures..
This article is really interesting and humorous, because it exposes the reality on the internet, nowadays there are tons of SEO companies emerging, and making a million promises, this article is for all those, who speak loud and the result is often undesirable.
And then there’s the thirteenth idiot, which is kind of like the thirteenth warrior, but a lot less heroic.
He’s the kind of mundane, mediocre SEO who’s never really brought anything new to the table at all, yet finds ample time and entertainment from caricaturizing the other bottom feeders in his pond and pigeonholing them to great comedic effect.
This is pretty darn funny. I feel a little sheltered as I have only come across a few of those in real life. They sound like a lot of ads I have read though. Very funny. I like the drawings too.
HEHE so funny!!
I too find myself in that shoe
Great lists (first 7 and these too) – I unfortunately have come across every single one of these characters a time or two. And now I feel bad as we just launched 3 packages (after 10 yrs of not having them).
We still focus on custom solutions, as every client has different needs and goals…. .02
Poor link requester is my favorite because I still get those emails!
Nice blog, I certainly know a few people who fall into these categories
100% agree with John.. great combination
I think I know at least one of each of these types, hilarious!
I have met all these people in the same organization… Nice work!
enjoyed the whole article. funny but still provides lots of information
Good ones, I really identify with the futuristic SEO expert because I come across a lot of those when trying to sell actual services that I can do right now.
Nicely done! I have encountered and avoided many of these.
M.R.
amazing! i came across everyone of these guys in my career!
Jajajaja, Very funny post, you happy my day
Yes, meet a lot of so called SEO Experts around. I’ve been everywhere.. You can mainly find them on blackhat forums sites and facebook groups, Quora too. As much as I’d like to correct their thinking about such foolishness or BS, I end up pitying them for the lack of knowledge and experience. I myself as an SEO Professional, I provide services to a different client around the world. They come with different interest and goals. I have a correction on the PACKAGING SEO person tho. I myself and surely tons of SEO companies/firm provides the same thing(packages), but I guess you didn’t know about the “CUSTOMED PACKAGE”.. And that is based on the client’s needs..Yes its not one size fits all that’s why there’s CUSTOMED PACKAGE. It depends on the kind of business he/she have.. coz there’s different ways to market their site.. Know everything about his/her business would give you the idea what campaign you’re going to provide him/her. Its not about throwing millions of backlinks to your clients its about building quality contents and links. Quality comes from natural link building or the whitehat way. It may take some time rank well on SERPS but surely will not get penalized or worst deindexed.
Tho 90% of Us SEOs have websites, but I myself been an seo for just 5 years(yes Im new) and til now don’t have a site of my own. but that doesn’t mean I’m a bogus, you see having clients(5 sometimes more), you have to tackle everything, from keyword research,competitive analysis, conversion optimization, down to whole campaign evaluation(then back to cycle 1), and lastly do some experimentation. Running campaigns with 5 to more clients by myself or sometimes with a team,would require much focus and a LOT of effort.. Good thing there’s a tool. Not Blackhat stuff, just tools such as MarketSamurai, OSE, etc.. but overall, this post is great and funny:) funny and 90% true!
I LOOOOOVE those illustrations. Great drawing style!
And, I must admit, I felt a bit… guilty… reading several of those SEO stereotypes;-)
Oliver
Very very entertaining. Great way of creating a story. Many things are so true and I giggled when I saw the packaging SEO. It reminds me of something funny. Great article!
I love this article.
And after the Penguin then these are having a hard time, dont u think?
Very funny stuff.
This is fun
I think there is a few new types of SEOs I would avoid.
1) The “Never Competed” SEO, always worked with fist-class clients with some SEO knowledge and a great product. Until he get that first client in a competitive field….
2) The “everything is a penalty” SEO, is always very prompt at sending alarming emails to anybody and everybody about his “theory” that there is a penalty when in fact there is none. This vastly increased with Penguins and Panda.
3) The “anti-social” SEO, just don’t like to talk to anyone, he fails most of the time.
13. SEO Suit: He overdresses in an attempt to make up for his lack of SEO skills.